Fighting to break up?

The song goes, breaking up is hard to do, but why is it?  Are we afraid of hurting the other person, or hurting ourselves, or because it’s just not fun?  When one person gets to the point where they want to end it, why is it so difficult to just spit it out?  An easier approach seems to be pick a fight, break it off. 

I’ve used this approach myself in the past.  I have been in relationships that I knew weren’t going to work, but just couldn’t seem to pull the trigger. I would find myself wishing the person would do something that really made me mad, so I could say, “goodbye” and walk away and feel like the jilted one.  Even though, I knew it was them that was getting tossed to the curb.  Do we do this so we don’t feel like the bad guy? 

There are legitimate reasons to break things off, including, I’m just not that into you anymore.  We can have a change of heart at any time, usually though it’s a build up.  Sometimes, the person is wonderful and the timing is off.  Sometimes, you just know there isn’t a long term path that can happen for lots of reasons.  Sometimes, it just doesn’t feel good.  Whatever the reason is, why do we have to be so cowardly to pick a fictitious fight so we can take our ball and go home.  It makes me laugh, that even at my age and older, we still do this. 

 When this has happened to me when I was younger, I would spend hours wondering what the fuck happened.  I would pour over every detail with my girlfriends and analyze the shit out of it.  All the time, never realizing the guy wasn’t right for me and I should be feeling grateful it was over with and could move on! 

When we are younger women, we tend to blame ourselves.  Now, I’m over 40 and have a lot more experience.  When it has happened in this stage of my life, I usually make one attempt to find out if the guy was serious and then let it go.  Obviously, I’m much better off without him and his issues.  Thank God, I’ve grown and evolved as a woman, and am comfortable in my own skin.  I’m grateful for my life, and for the chances it gives me. 

For everyone out there who has had this happen to them, look forward not back, the only thing back there is an ass!