I ain’t sayin she’s a Golddigger….

Golddigger, such an expressive word.  When I think of a golddigger, I think of a young women marrying a really old rich guy kinda like Anna Nicole Smith.  Now days, dating anyone with means tends to bring up the term. Why is dating or marrying a man with money considered so heinous?  Is it just a jealousy thing?  Do the have nots just want to pick at the haves? 

When I got married, I married for love.  We didn’t have anything and I didn’t divorce well.  Not saying I was in a shack, but I had to go back to work after being a stay at home mom.  My sister married for love and was hurt financially since the guy turned out to be a huge slacker.  So when you are damaged financially by the one you love, wouldn’t it make sense to date someone with money? 

The first guy I dated out of my marriage was very wealthy.  He wanted to get married, I didn’t, but I wore a huge ring on my finger for 9 months.  If I had married him, I would have been like the bird kept in the golden cage.  Trapped, but in really nice surroundings!  It wasn’t worth it to me, and since I wasn’t marrying a diamond, I broke it off. 

Now, I have had a habit of dating wealthy men for most of the time I’ve been divorced.  I don’t know if it’s a them finding me, or me finding them or what.  I sometimes think since I happen to have a more dominant personality, the only ones that can handle it are men who are secure. ( funny thing is, as secure as they are in business, they usually aren’t in relationships) Now, some of those guys were just f in crazy.  I told a few of them that the only thing that keeps people from calling them crazy is the amount of zeros in their bank accounts!  They are described as “eccentric”.  I think that’s the definition of eccentric btw,  frickin crazy with a lot of money. 

The weird thing is, as much as I’m attracted to men with money, they turn me off too.  They think they can buy anyone, and truth be told, they usually can.  They also tend to cheat on you especially when they have multiple homes because they can.  I went out with a guy one time here in Scottsdale and within a week, found out he was dating 3 other gals and they all thought they were going to marry him!  They thought that because he told them that!  This guy is one of the biggest manwhores in AZ, and I immediately told him I wasn’t going out with him again. 

Men use money to get women, just like women use their looks to get men.  I don’t think it’s a bad thing if both parties have their eyes open to what their commodity is.  It’s only bad if there is no honesty involved, or if money or looks are the only motivation.  Both can be gone in a blink of the eye as the recent economy has taught us.  Women like to feel secure financially,  and emotionally.  Men like to be the provider of that security.  It goes back to the caveman mentality and I think we have really gotten away from it. 

The only men that I would have considered marrying since my divorce are actually the ones that made the least amount of money.  They weren’t poor, but definitely had to work.  I found that they had more in common with me and were just easy to be with.   A friend asked me if I met a great guy who didn’t make much money, would I date him.  I had to be honest and say no I wouldn’t.  I need someone who strives to be successful and who brings something to the table like me.  I don’t need him to be a Bill Gates, but he needs to be successful at whatever he does and that means financially as well.  I don’t need a man to support me, but I’m not going to support him either.  I am attracted to smart, funny, successful men and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.  Thoughts??

Advertisement