Life is a competition…

Life is a competition where most of us are like, “Bring on the games”!  When I was in school, the teachers tried to make everything a competition including who got to take the kick ball out for recess.  I usually won that one, because I learned very quickly she was looking for “may I take the kick ball”, not “can I take the kick ball”.  I have never forgotten that lesson and my kids hate that!

I don’t like the fact that in schools today, they  try to down play competition unless you’re on a sports team.  If we don’t teach our kids how to compete early and well, they aren’t going to make it as adults!  EVERYTHING, is a competition!  Jobs, driving, (ok, the driving one is for me, not sure if it’s a sport) and also love is a competition.

Now, competing for men is one area I don’t like competing in.  I want to be chased and pursued, but not in a crazy stalker way.  I’m an attractive girl, with a lot of brains and wit, so sometimes, I think they should be working for me, not the other way around.  I think I have it wrong.  Men want to be pursued also, (I think at least!) and by me taking myself out of the competition, I’m actually hurting my chances at finding a guy.

Since men are the one area in my life I don’t compete in,  I keep asking myself WTF is wrong with me??  Does it have to do with my fear of commitment? Do I purposely avoid putting myself in the game because I don’t want to be picked?  I remember being in grade school and at recess you played kickball,  and it was crucial to your social stature that you didn’t get picked last.  Remember how much it hurt and sucked when you were the last kid standing??  So why do I put myself in that position?

I think I am the last kid standing when it comes to competing in love.  I also know I have myself to thank for that position, since I put myself there.  Some men think I’m intimidating when I meet them, and thinking about it, they are probably right.  I have a very quick wit and am not afraid to use it! It probably comes off as bitchiness, when it’s really just a wall I’ve thrown up.  So, maybe for 2010, I learn to use my mouth to smile more, and watch what I say till someone gets used to me!  And maybe learn to trust a little more too.  Thoughts??

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