Are we interviewing for a date??

Have you noticed that the dating process has become more of an interview for a job??  I think with the huge amount of people meeting on the internet, the first phone conversation becomes an interview, sans the references!

It’s not about the getting to know you on a personal level, as much as it’s a “how long you’ve been divorced, what’s your custody arrangements,  and who’s fault was it?”  I mean really, where is the romance and the courtship anymore??

Has the world-wide web turned getting to know one another into an interview?  If so, how do we get a second interview? We always try to be on our best behavior when getting to know someone of the opposite sex, just as we try to do the same thing when we are vying for a job.  Do we have so much to hide about our personal life and it’s failures that we embellish?

I always say there are two sides to the story and somewhere in between lies the truth.  I know I had a hand in my divorce even though I would totally love to blame my ex. If we get fired from a job, or quit, is it our fault or theirs??  I think in most cases, again, it’s a combination of the two.

So, back to the interview.  It seems like we have a list of likes and dislikes, and things that can be tolerated and we want the answers to them almost immediately so we don’t waste our time.  But what happens if the person we are interested in is a bad interviewer and we dismiss them when if we took the opportunity to know them a little bit more, they may be a good fit?

It seems as a society, we are very quick to judge, and I’m guilty of that too.  Sometimes I wish I was back in the 50′s when you took your time to get to know someone, there were no social medias to fuck it up and we couldn’t google the person.  I think we have a lot of outside color coming into play that may make us make the wrong decision.

I’m not saying I don’t appreciate the web, since I’m writing on it, or that I don’t love google, but there is a lot less effort going into the dating process than in the past as we actually had to do it in person, not through a text, or facebook update.  So, is it better to interview, or is it damaging??  Heck, I don’t know the answer, all I know is there are a lot of singletons looking for love, and are we letting technology guide our decisions?

Is it better to say too much??

Well, John Mayer wrote a song called “Say” and it truly is one of my most fav songs.  I love everything about it and I vowed that this year, 2010, I would say more of what I was feeling when it came to relationships and guess what?  I still SUCK at it!  HAHAHAHAH!  At least I know I suck at it though. Does that make a difference?

I said that I would use my voice more and say the things that make me uncomfortable to the person who needs to hear them.  So, here it is near the end of March, and I’m still not using my big girl words.  WTF is wrong with me???

Back in February, I went on a trip with a man and gave him a very thoughtful, personal valentine gift that I made.  Now, it wasn’t a cheesy home sewn gift, and by the way, I happen to like sweet gifts for V day.  Now on my birthday and Christmas??  Feel free to go hog-wild, but for V day, I like more sentiment attached to my gift.

So, I made a gift that was a book of photos I had taken of myself by a professional, ( they weren’t freaking glamour shots ok??) and not to sound vain, they turned out really great.  I had asked different male friends and female friends before hand if they thought it was a good gift, since I had never done that before and all of them said, it was a great gift.  I mean, if you were a guy, wouldn’t you want a pic of your girls boobs??  And btw, since my surgery, my girls look spectacular!  I digress.

Well, I gave him the book and let’s just say the reaction was less than stellar.  It was completely underwhelming to the point of I got a “that’s pretty” and that was it.  So he puts the book on the nightstand and doesn’t mention it again.  The next morning we were leaving, so since he didn’t look at it again, I put it in my luggage.  Then I brought it home and kept it.  He’s never once mentioned that he has it, or doesn’t have it, it’s like it never took place.

I haven’t brought it up with him and he hasn’t either.  My girlfriends think I should say something to him, and I haven’t.  It really hurt my feelings that he didn’t like it, or appreciate it or the effort it took to get it made.  So, should I say something, or just let it drop.  Part of me doesn’t care that much to make a stink about it, but obviously it’s still bugging me or I wouldn’t be writing about it.  Thoughts anyone??